waiting and wishing

i frosted my nails again. they look hot.
i love how they look like satin.

-taibah out

fleece blankets and jones sodas

havent written a good blog post in awhile...

been busy/lazy.
i dont know if thats really possible to be lazy AND busy at the same time. but guess what? in taibah's world ANYTHING is possible :)
so yeah, been busy/lazy.

exams got in the way earlier this month, as was my term assignment for one of my business law classes. but alhumdulliah, those classes are over now. no more case studies, retarded papers, and boring readings to suffer with. However, group study sessions were productive this year, better than last year i find, maybe cuz everyone else was older and more mature...hmm, oh wells.

my sister, brother inlaw and niece came to visit for 2 weeks. i enjoyed their visit very much. its strange seeing a baby hangout at my house. A walk down the hallway to my bedroom was pretty interesting during this time. you'd always see a baby sock or one of baby's face towels lying around in the hall. It was pretty cute actually, i just wasnt used to it.

its a habit of mine to sleep really late, i normally fall asleep between the hours of 1am-5am. usually, the house is dead quiet during these hours. However, during my niece's visit, it was kinda different. As im busily doing something useless and boring in my room id hear her cry during the night at odd hours.

it was really sad when their visit was over. but insha allah ill be seeing them again really soon.

in other news, i want to get my eyebrow pierced. the parents have said no, but that might change rite? hmmmmm.

-taibah out

and we laughed so hard it hurt!

Her: never marry for money because one day god can take it away
Her: and then what will you have
Me: ....his parents?
Me: LOL
Me: im sorry
Me: :S
Her: HAHAHAHAH
Her: OMG
Her: HAHAHAHAHAH
Her: THAT WAS SO FUNNY
Her: DEAR GOD
Her: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
Me: lol
Me: dude, im pathetic, im sorry
Her: seriously though
Her: that was gold
Her: im not even kidding
Me: lol

-taibah out

'im sovy for everything'

and its ended.
and its what i wanted rite?
yes. it is.
and its ended.
then why, god why, do i feel like crying?
too late. the tear drops have started.
and its ended.
you said trust?
what the hell is there to trust?
and its ended.
i wont sink that low.
i dont sink that low.
you do, though.
and its ended.

yes, its ended.
did it?
really really ended?

yes.
its come to an end.

happy now?

do i say yes? its what i wanted. its what i always wanted.

thanks.

-taibah out

blow out the matches this time

health.
oh dear god, i beg you now, TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOUR HEALTH!!!
being drained all the time aint fun anymore :(
neither are the blood tests and endless pokes and prod's at the doctor's office :(

iA, ill be ok. right?
:(

-taibah out

ending up in all the wrong places

as if you're walking around with eyes glued shut, you crash into things and then you can get hurt.
i feel as if some people are living life with their eyes shut. but that's their fault, not mine. right?

lately, ive been keeping certain things replay over and over again in my head. for example, the quote that id love to carve into my skin someday: Takes a lifetime to earn respect, takes a second to lose it. Every step matters. Time is zipping right past me so quickly, and its running out. What would happen tomorrow? Anything.

-taibah out

steamboat cafe

"...and so now im stuck being a person i dont want to be"

but whos fault is that? who told you to keep pretending to be someone you werent?

ouch, my neck and back ache alot.
i havent rested properly for the past month or so. i barely have the time to sleep to let my body relax and rest the way it used to. Id love to spend an entire day sleeping, to re-generate that energy inside me by closing my eyes and letting myself fall into a deep deep sleep and where i can dream of flying carpets and dancing flowers and punch fountains and eating grapefruit :)

-taibah out

jasmine scented candles, yum!

im sooo exhausted all the time, and i dont even know why.
actually i do,
life is just so tiring at the moment.

exams are nearby so ive been busy with school and studying.
family is another thing, been madly busy with that.

ill write again soon.
something good iA.
-taibah out